Keeping Marriage Alive After Baby Makes Three

Keeping Marriage Alive After Baby Makes Three -06/25/06 – 03:24:01 PM

Stephanie Dunnewind of the Seattle Times wrote an article that appears in today’s Raleigh News & Observer about embracing your inner hot mom. It provides a good overview of what women who become moms face in maintaining a sense of self, as well as keeping their marriages alive. One of the greatest threats to a vital and happy marriage is the addition of a child. While it is indeed a joyful event, it creates a challenge to the marriage.

Newborns require a lot of attention and new moms are frequently overwhelmed by the additional tasks. New dads often feel financial pressure to provide for the baby. They often also feel left out of the mother-child bond. Striking a balance is difficult and it is often the marital relationship that suffers. Babies’ needs are immediate; spouses’ and individual needs can be delayed. Unfortunately, this delay often turns into routine neglect, both for the mom and her partner.

Taking time out for yourself or your relationship may seem impossible, selfish, or both. It is, however, essential if the parents and their relationship are to thrive. Maintaining intimacy is necessary during this time, no matter how impossible it may seem. Take advantage of the time the baby is asleep. Dads can help out by taking on some of the daily tasks so moms don’t view sex as one more chore on their to do list. Moms can be more aware that sex is often a means that men use to communicate their deeper feelings. Taking care of yourself and your partner during this time is actually the best gift you can give your newborn. Ensuring the soundness of the marriage ensures safety and stability for the child and provides him/her with a strong foundation to face the world.

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